“When my husband died after a long struggle with Parkinson’s Disease, I wasn’t sure if I needed grief work, because I had grieved a lot of losses along the way. His death gave me permission to feel grief, and I found myself feeling grief about other things from my past, too, as I contemplated starting a new life. Who am I now? What do I want to do? I found that I had a lot of burdensome thought patterns that emanated from my childhood. With the help of this program, I was able to address old wounds that were affecting my ability to make a new start. Now I feel like I’m on an adventure, a journey into myself and out into life!”
CINDY SLADE
We all know that loss happens. As adults, we intellectually understand that we will be mourners multiple times throughout our lives. Yet when those losses happen, it’s emotional, not intellectual. We feel it. No matter how much logic and brain power we use, we still feel the pain and sadness. That’s because you have a broken heart, not a broken brain— though it may seem like your brain is broken because it might be in over-drive thinking about your loss, memories, what-ifs, unmet expectations, etc. You might find yourself thinking of a happy memory that ends in pain because you wish things had been different or better.
Upon experiencing a loss, grief is immediate, normal, and natural. It includes the full range of thoughts and human emotions, such as sadness, relief, pain, disappointment, anger, and heartache. You may be wondering if it is possible to recover from something that happens intensely, naturally and is normal?
To answer that question, let me first make two distinctions.
First: Sadness is a natural human emotion. You’re allowed to be human and to have human emotions, whether or not those around you know how to support you.
Second: Pain, which can include emotions such as anger, heartache, or disappointment, is caused by unresolved emotions and incomplete communications. These painful emotions are the heavy weight that, together, we can lift from your shoulders. This is recovery.
Recovery is about experiencing memories without your mind wandering and wishing things might have been different. It’s about feeling better, being willing, and having the ability to fully engage in relationships again. It’s about feeling safe, even when creating a new or updated version of your dreams and expectations for the future.
Sharing the thoughts and feelings you experience following a loss is absolutely beneficial. Yet, maybe you haven’t found a safe environment to express your grief. Or maybe you find that you keep telling the story of your loss but nothing inside has shifted. Recovery from loss is accomplished through being in a safe environment and by making a series of small, correct choices. This is how I will help you. We’ll walk through your grief with the guidance of the Grief Recovery Method. You’ll learn and experience the steps to help you feel better and to live without fear of being hurt again.